Happy Father's Day

Hi Dad,

Happy Father's Day!  Each time I get a message with something about Father's Day I feel like someone has punched me in the gut again.  For the first time in my life, I can't think about what I can get you, what you need, what you might want.  And it hurts... but as the meme below says.... grief is really just love - love that you want to give, but cannot. But I can and I will... I will always love you even though I can't see or touch you. And that love does gather in the corners of my eyes, forms a lump in my throat, and hollows out my chest.

And I honored you today with a half-marathon - Duo at the Ledges.  It was a fundraiser for the Lymphoma and Leukemia Society, so I thought it was appropriate.  I printed out your photo (the one from Jennie and Adam's wedding - of you with the most beautiful, loving, compassionate, proud smile). I had it laminated and I pinned it to the back of my Michigan Runner's shirt - the one that says, "Courage to start, will to endure, strength to finish".  The quote always reminds me of you because you had the will (and love) to endure so much and the strength beyond measure.

Well the weather forecast wasn't too bad - misty rain, about 64 degrees.

Well, that was the forecast - we ran through a thunderstorm, massive downpours, puddles on the sidewalks and roads, and mud.  But we did it - we reminisced about walks at Lake Welsh, building trenches around the campsite, swimming at Lake Welsh, and drives from Lake Welsh to work so we could spend an extra week or two there.  I wondered about your picture and would it hold up in the rain - it did (as did my phone, which was in my hydration pack).  I thought about how much you did for all of us over the years, and this seemed minuscule by comparison and it was.

But I'm proud to have done it in your honor! And by the way, I got an age group PR - fastest half marathon I've done since October 2016!  Came in third in my age group (of three, but hay, I still got a medal for coming in third).  

Well, Happy Father's Day.... love you!

Susan